Happy Tuesdays

Tick tock goes the clock

2012-02-07T05:47:00.000-08:00

This past weekend, I was running (literally) to catch the train so I could go from Brooklyn to the Upper East Side in 45 minutes. I knew it was nearly impossible, but I had to try to be at work on time. The first train was fine, except it started to run local. Then after a few stops it ran express and my anxiety was relieved. Once I got to the station where I needed to change trains, the next train arrived at the platform. As I got on, I heard the conductor say, "This train will now run express". Ugh! I just needed to go two stops on the local. So, I get off the train. I'm fuming. I check my watch. I'm already five minutes late. I could feel the anxiety growing. Five minutes later, when the proper train arrives, I run on, and a big grin filled my face. On the train was this mom with a big 'ol Kermit the Frog knitted hat. We immediately started chatting and she said she had found one for her and one for her baby, but the baby often will say, "No Kermie!". I showed her my dorky Kermit pictures and we shared Kermit stories. As I left, she said how nice it was to brighten someone's day. Once I saw her and started chatting, I realized, sometimes life is all about timing. If that earlier train had been one that I could have taken, I wouldn't have met that kind and cute woman who made my day.

“Patience is power.
Patience is not an absence of action;
rather it is "timing"
it waits on the right time to act,
for the right principles
and in the right way.”

-Fulton J. Sheen

I know I need to chill out a bit more and just relax in all aspects of my life--work, love, friendships.
I need to realize that when the timing is right, everything will work out as it is supposed to.

“Your best work involves timing. If someone wrote the best hip hop song of all time in the Middle Ages, he had bad timing.” -Scott Adams

If the timing's right and the gods are with you, something special happens.-Rick Springfield

Sometimes being a friend means mastering the art of timing. There is a time for silence. A time to let go and allow people to hurl themselves into their own destiny. And a time to prepare to pick up the pieces when it's all over. -Octavia Butler

You cannot afford to wait for perfect conditions. Goal setting is often a matter of balancing timing against available resources. Opportunities are easily lost while waiting for perfect conditions.-Gary Ryan Blair

I love the idea of "the one" but I actually believe that there isn't a Miss Right. There are 12,000 Miss Rights out there and it's all timing. -Matthew Perry

Ask and you shall...

2011-11-15T09:32:00.001-08:00

Everything comes to us that belongs to us if we create the capacity to receive it."
-Rabindranath Tagore

re·ceive/riˈsēv/

Verb:

Be given, presented with, or paid (something): "most businesses will receive a tax cut".
Take delivery of (something sent or communicated): "he received fifty inquiries".

I've worked a lot on acceptance, and forgiveness, happiness, making myself happy, looking out for me, moving forward.....something I am still stuck on in certain parts of my life is receiving. I have such a difficult time being the recipient of "niceness". I like to give. I read this quote and totally related to it:

From then on, I realized this is what I want to do, what I'm supposed to do: Giving energy and receiving it back through applause. I love it. That's my world. I love it. I enjoy it. I live for it." -Erykah Badu

I know that is often what brings me the most happiness---giving. Whether it be cookies on my blissful block, a handshake and a smile as my wonderful boys enter the studio, or the cashier at the register that deserves a thank you--I love that external energy.

However, it makes it a bit difficult when I sometimes also feel like this:

There is a secret about human love that is commonly overlooked: Receiving it is much more scary and threatening than giving it. How many times in your life have you been unable to let in someone's love or even pushed it away? Much as we proclaim the wish to be truly loved, we are often afraid of that, and so find it difficult to open to love or let it all the way in. -John Welwood

For this Happy Tuesday, I'm working on the giving as well as the receiving. May you have a Tuesday filled with receiving all the beautiful things that life is offering to you....and take 'em darn it!

When you truly give up trying to be whole through others, you end up receiving what you always wanted from others. -Shakti Gawain

Generosity is giving more than you can, and pride is taking less than you need. -Kahlil Gibran

Just for a bit of fun:

Connect 4

2011-10-25T14:11:00.000-07:00

con·nec·tion (k-nkshn)

a. The act of connecting.

b. The state of being connected.

2. One that connects; a link: made a connection between the two pipes.

3. An association or relationship: There appeared to be no connection between the two crimes.

4. The logical or intelligible ordering of words or ideas; coherence.

5. Reference or relation to something else; context: In this connection, the agreement can be seen as a step toward peace.

6. A person, especially one of influence or importance, with whom one is associated, as by kinship or common interests: used her connections to land a job.

7. A conveyance or scheduled run providing continuing service between means of transportation: missed my connection in Atlanta.

8. A physical link, such as by wire or fiber-optic cable, between two or more points in a telecommunications system: established a connection to the Internet.

9. A means or channel of communication: couldn't hear due to the bad phone connection.

10. Slang

a. A drug dealer.

b. A purchase of illegal drugs.

I love to puzz. Puzzling is one of my favorite Winter activities. I love figuring out how all the pieces connect and you can start to look for the pieces that fit together (you even start dreaming in puzzles after a while...maybe that's just me!). I'm finding that the puzzle pieces of my relationships are much more difficult that those Ravensburgers that I love so much.

As of late, my social and work calendars have been so packed--I feel like I'm short circuiting due to over-connecting. It doesn't help that I've lost my voice, yet once again, which doesn't allow for me to communicate and connect the way I like to. I'm still learning my lessons of connecting with disingenuous people and realizing that there are very few people in life who are honest, caring & have the capacity to have a genuine connection. Gotta keep listening to my instincts and sussing out who is genuine and who's just a jerkface. Whew. It's rough work. Maybe I'll just take a short hibernation....

Here's to a Tuesday of connection--with your self, your community, your friends, your favorite book...Happy Tuesday!

We are all so much together, but we are all dying of loneliness.

-Albert Schweitzer

Throughout our lives we long to love ourselves more deeply and to feel connected with others. Instead, we often contract, fear intimacy, and suffer a bewildering sense of separation. We crave love, and yet we are lonely. Our delusion of being separate from one another, of being apart from all that is around us, gives rise to all of this pain. -Sharon Salzberg

Only through our connectedness to other can we really know and enhance the self. And only through working on the self can we begin to enhance our connectedness to others.

-Harriet Goldhor Lerner

Only connect! That was the whole of her sermon. Only connect the prose and the passion, and both will be exalted, and human love will be seen at its height. Live in fragments no longer. Only connect. -E.M. Forster

Self-absorption in all its forms kills empathy, let alone compassion. When we focus on ourselves, our world contracts as our problems and preoccupations loom large. But when we focus on others, our world expands. Own own problems drift to the periphery of the mind and so seem smaller, and we increase our capacity for connection--or compassionate action. -Daniel Goleman

The most basic and powerful way to connect to another person is to listen. Just listen. Perhaps the most important thing we ever give each other is our attention.... A loving silence often has far more power to heal and to connect than the most well-intentioned words.

- Rachel Naomi Remen

We cannot live for ourselves alone. Our lives are connected by a thousand invisible threads, and along these sympathetic fibers, our actions run as causes and return to us as results.

- Herman Melville

Be Fearless

2011-10-11T19:46:00.000-07:00

I'm not afraid of storms, for I'm learning how to sail my ship.

-Louisa May Alcott

Last weekend I went to a Haunted House. They had the attendees fill out a card before entering the event. The card asked what you were most afraid of. After hearing other people's answers of: the dark, spiders, bugs...I realized my answer of, "being unloved", was really not what they might have been looking for. There goes my honesty getting me into trouble again!

Fear is that little darkroom where negatives are developed.

-Michael Pritchard

I've been terrified lately. I've been so filled with fear that I think I've been making myself sick! This week, after receiving my fortune cookie that said, "Don't Panic", I thought it was time to just face my fears head on. Here's to being fearless and embracing those things that terrify you. Happy Tuesday. Be fearless! I'm gonna keep my little ship sailing along as I greet those fears every day.

He who fears to suffer, suffers from fear. ~French Proverb

Fear grows in darkness; if you think there's a bogeyman around, turn on the light.
-Dorothy Thompson

Fear is a question: What are you afraid of, and why? Just as the seed of health is in illness, because illness contains information, your fears are a treasure house of self-knowledge if you explore them. -Marilyn Ferguson

Fear is my good friend, it shows me the way to nowhere; I choose another way.
-Yossi Ghinsberg

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our Light, not our Darkness, that most frightens us.
-Marianne Williamson

Be good to you

2011-10-04T19:11:00.000-07:00

I don't like myself, I'm crazy about myself -Mae West

Last week, I had the opportunity to go with one of my favorite neighbor peeps, Lisa, to her weekly yoga class at East Yoga. The class was great (not the same as my favorite Tglaz at Abhaya in Dumbo...) and she had us focus on a person we loved and something we wanted to give that person. I chose one of the most loved people in my life and chose love of self. We spent the hour and fifteen minutes devoting our practice to them, and fast forward, at the end of class the teacher says, "...and you chose this quality for your person because it's actually what you need for yourself". Bazaam! Totes.

You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection. -Budddha

I think I'm really good at loving other people. I'm good at taking care of them. Making their favorite treat to surprise them. Finding the perfect little thing to suit them. Listening when they need to talk. But, I'm not the best at taking care of myself. I hate cooking for myself. I'd rather listen than blabber on about my problems. I'll make a flour filled dessert before a mediocre gluten free treat that I could have myself....

So, this week's Happy Tuesday is about taking care of yourself and being good to yourself. Take some time today and do something for you that you would normally do for someone you love. Love who you are today and take care of that beautiful person.

To love oneself is the beginning of a life-long romance” -Oscar Wilde

If you aren't good at loving yourself, you will have a difficult time loving anyone, since you'll resent the time and energy you give another person that you aren't even giving to yourself. -Barbara De Angelis

People who do not love themselves can adore others, because adoration is making someone else big and ourselves small. They can desire others, because desire comes out of a sense of inner incompleteness, which demands to be filled. But they can not love others, because love is an affirmation of the living growing being in all of us. If you don't have it, you can't give it.
-Andrew Matthews

It is of practical value to learn to like yourself. Since you must spend so much time with yourself you might as well get some satisfaction out of the relationship. -Norman Vincent Peale

Instinct

2011-09-27T08:51:00.000-07:00

Let your heart guide you. It whispers, so listen carefully. -Littlefoot's mother

There can be as much value in the blink of an eye as in months of rational analysis.-Malcolm Gladwell

It's not easy to trust your own instincts. It's so easy to second guess ourselves and try to rely on logic. Something I learned about myself this summer was that I typically have really good instincts, the Tamstinct I like to call it. Here's to a Tuesday of following your heart, your own gut, your true instincts.

in·stinct

1. An inborn pattern of behavior that is characteristic of a species and is often a response to specific environmental stimuli: the spawning instinct in salmon; altruistic instincts in social animals.

2. A powerful motivation or impulse.

3. An innate capability or aptitude: an instinct for tact and diplomacy.

Art and works of art do not make an artist; sense and enthusiasm and instinct do.

-Karl Wilhelm Friedrich Schlegel

I would rather trust a woman's instinct than a man's reason. -Stanley Baldwin

In art as in love, instinct is enough. -Anatole France

Look within

2011-09-22T09:56:00.000-07:00

This summer has offered me the luxury of spending lots of time alone. It's been wonderful...for the most part. I was recently spending a lovely Sunday afternoon doing my weekly snail mail ritual and came upon this quote on a card:

"Look Within. You are the world". -J. Krishnamurti

For some reason, it really struck me and I realized that I've been spending the summer expanding my horizons, widening my friend circle, taking on new challenges, and in a sense, making my world a bigger place. Even though my outer world is expanding, I've also been building the little world that is me. Sometimes I don't like what I find. Sometimes I want to leave my world and travel to another. Sometimes I just give in and say, this is me, and I try to just love every little branch, every stream, and every pile of trash that's in that planet.

Phew. It's not easy people. Here's to expanding your world. Your self. You.

You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. What you'll discover will be wonderful. What you'll discover is yourself. ~Alan Alda

In search of my mother's garden, I found my own. ~Alice Walker

Bypasses are devices that allow some people to dash from point A to point B very fast while other people dash from point B to point A very fast. People living at point C, being a point directly in between, are often given to wonder what's so great about point A that so many people from point B are so keen to get there and what's so great about point B that so many people from point A are so keen to get there. They often wish that people would just once and for all work out where the hell they wanted to be.

~Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

Your work is to discover your world and then with all your heart give yourself to it. ~Buddha

Ease Up

2011-09-18T12:56:00.000-07:00

"Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there someday". -Winnie the Pooh

Those who know me know that I often am in a state of constant motion. I much prefer to be active and doing something, rather than sitting around. I often have a very hard time just doing nothing. Sitting is not one of my strong suits. However, I think the universe is telling me to ease up and slow my roll as of late. I injured my foot and have been literally forced to slow down--my daily walking has become more of a mindful meditation instead of a timed route to work. My desire to give up my seat has become a selfish need to sit down.

I think it's been a good lesson for me. Sometimes it's a good lesson to just take it easy. It's also made me think of easing up on myself. While striving to be better people we are often very harsh on ourselves and don't give ourselves a break. I think everyone is just doing the best they can. As I have my boys in class do, give yourself a pat on the back today. Ease up on yourself, on others that you may be judging or impatient with, on that cashier that's taking too long, on the person walking too slow in front of you.

As I make my slow pilgrimage through the world, a certain sense of beautiful mystery seems to gather and grow. -A.C. Benson

I'm a slow walker, but I never walk back. -Abraham Lincoln

If death meant just leaving the stage long enough to change costume and come back as a new character, would you slow down? Or speed up? -Chuck Palahniuk

2011-08-30T12:25:00.000-07:00

I have wandered all my life, and I have also traveled; the difference between the two being this, that we wander for distraction, but we travel for fulfillment".

-Hilaire Belloc

on the road in Ubud, Bali

After returning from three weeks of travel, I'm struck by how full I am. Maybe full of thai food, experiences, stories...but I feel as though I'm bursting. I'm exploding with delight. With enthusiasm. With happiness. I feel this sense of awe and wonder about how fortunate I am in my life. I am so overwhelmed with greatness.

ful·fill·ment

noun

the act or state of fulfilling: to witness the fulfillment of adream; to achieve fulfillment of one's hopes.

the state or quality of being fulfilled; completion;realization: a vague plan that had no hope of fulfillment.

Success, happiness, peace of mind and fulfillment-the most priceless of human treasures are available among us, without exception, who makes things happen - who make "good" things happen - in the world around them". -Joe Klock

Life finds its purpose and fulfillment in the expansion of happiness".

-Maharishi Mahesh Yogi

Letting go of all expectations, with travel and this summer, has been so gratifying and fulfilling. I am looking forward to what the Fall has in store for me. Keep enjoying this 'human treasure' and expanding into the world around you. Some Happy moments along my travels...

Siem Reap, Camdodia

Bangkok Airport

2011-08-09T08:53:00.000-07:00

If your actions inspire others to dream more, learn more,

do more and become more, you are a leader.

-John Qunicy Adams

Inspire:
verb (used with object)

to fill with an animating, quickening, or exalting influence:His courage inspired his followers.

to produce or arouse (a feeling, thought, etc.): to inspireconfidence in others.

to fill or affect with a specified feeling, thought, etc.: toinspire a person with distrust.

to influence or impel: Competition inspired her to greaterefforts.

to animate, as an influence, feeling, thought, or the like,does: They were inspired by a belief in a better future.

When I was in high school I was a huge dork (oh yes, believe it or not dear ones). I wore oversized t-shirts, Winnie-the-Pooh overalls, pigtails...oh dear. The pictures are scary. In my high school English class, we read Lord of the Flies. In the novel, there is one leader of the group: Ralph. We had a writing project in which we were broken up into 7 smaller groups. Each group had to choose one person out of our own class that would act as the Ralph character--the leader of the whole class. Imagine my dork-a-rific self in total surprise when every group had chosen me. I couldn't understand why. I wasn't what I thought of as a leader of people.

"I always manage to inspire a strong reaction one way or another" -Nathan Lane

Recently, I was able to relate to this idea more. I had a very new friend as well as a very long time friend both tell me that I inspire them. Now brown cow, I don't think I'm all that and a bag of chips, but I suddenly understood my high school English class. My new-ish friend said to me, "You don't see it do you? People see the way you're living your life. The way you are being you. The way you manage to write personalized notes to everyone, gather a group, bake a ton of goodies and still be happy. They see you and they don't understand it, yet they are inspired themselves to do more and be better people" {and I'm paraphrasing here...I think I got most of it right :)}.

Maybe when people see that it's possible to do what you love, be who you are and still have a sense of fulfillment it also seems possible for them?

"Our chief want is someone who will inspire us to

be what we know we could be" -Ralph Waldo Emerson

It's affirming for me to have good friends tell me such things. Better that than they can't stand me, right? Since I've been traveling solo without many people to talk to or bake for or simply tell they are great people I've felt myself get a bit sad. I realize what a crucial part of my day to day life those sort of things are. I am so inspired by people in my life--from my own parents who married very young not knowing what the world had in store for them, to friends who take on totally new careers, unsure what will happen. People who bravely open themselves up to a new love, new life, new experiences. There are so many sources of inspiration out there. What inspires you? I'd love to know. We can all start sourcing our inspiration water from the same well.

"My purpose is to inspire people of all walks of life to discover the virtue inherent within them and to bring forth that virtue in their daily lives". -William Shirley

2011-08-02T13:28:00.000-07:00

Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind.--Dr. Seuss

Today you are You,

that is truer than true.

There is no one alive

who is Youer than You.--Dr. Seuss

I have been having the best summer of my life. This summer, I've just tried to be me. I've lived most of my life worried what people thought of me. I was worried that they didn't like me, possibly annoyed with how I acted, what I said, if they thought I was nice or smart or pretty. After getting my nice, smart, pretty butt dumped, I was worried that it was because they didn't like who I was. I started this year spending time with someone who thought I was too much. I have spent the summer just enjoying who I am and being that person every day. I surround myself with wonderful people who seem to like this person that is me. Maybe they still get annoyed, but I'm at a point where I think that is their issue and they don't have to spend time with me if they don't like me :). It's a great sense of freedom and I have so much more time to think about ways to make my little universe a better place, rather than consuming myself with what other people think of me. So, go out in to the amazing world just being you. Enjoy it. Embrace it. Love it.

By your own soul, learn to live

And if men thwart you take no heed.

If men hate you have no care.

Sing your song, dream your dream,

Hope your hope and pray your prayer.--Parkenham Beatty

I was once afraid of people saying, "Who does she think she is?" Now I have the courage to stand and say, "This is who I am."--Oprah Winfrey

If you are what you should be, then you will set the world on fire.--St. Catherine of Siena

oh, that's right, I'll personalize your HT if you live near me and request it :)

2011-07-27T22:46:00.000-07:00

Laughter

If we couldn't laugh, we would all go insane -Jimmy Buffett

Many years ago, a woman that I knew commented on my laugh. I mentioned how my mom and I sound very similar when we laugh. Her response was, "It's called a cackle, dear". I don't know that I'll ever forget that comment and when I get a really excited and giggly and my laugh is about to explode, I always think of how I'm grateful I'm similar to my mom in that witchy way.

I have been laughing so much lately that I feel like I have perma-grin.

Spending time with people who make you giggle.
A humorous take on dating and love making me chortle during a show.
Little boys who steal my heart with their honest and charming statements of life
...oh, how joyous it all is!

"Laughter is the shock absorber that eases the blows of life"

"A smile starts on the lips, a grin spreads to the eyes, a chuckle comes from the belly; but a good laugh bursts forth from the soul, overflows and bubbles all around". -Carolyn Birmingham

This whole row of empty chairs set up perfectly made me laugh out loud. Hi-larious.

2011-07-19T14:28:00.000-07:00

YES!

adverb

(used to express affirmation or assent or to mark the addition of something emphasizing and amplifying aprevious statement): Do you want that? Yes, I do.

My good friend Jaime Noche and I have this little routine we do over the phone where one of us might be excited about something and we just scream, "YES!". We may have the tendency to become overly annoying, say it fifty times, with extreme volume and extend the word so that it lasts about 20 seconds. I love these moments.

Every day, I've been trying to just say "yes" to every opportunity that comes my way. Somehow, this little bubble of a universe I've created for myself keeps offering me so many favorable situations. It's incredible what happens when you just say YEEESSSS!

"The big question is whether you are going to be able to say a hearty yes to your adventure". -Joseph Campbell

"I imagine that yes is the only living thing".

e.e. cummings

"As I say yes to life, life says yes to me!".

Louise Hay

What are you going to say "yes" to today?

2011-07-05T19:05:00.000-07:00

Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be, because sooner or later, if you are posing, you will forget the pose, and then where are you? ~Fanny Brice

Spent the weekend in a part of the world where many people are posing and trying to be something else--something they think they should be or want to pretend to be. I, myself, spent the weekend just enjoying who I am--that person I like to be. The honest and gracious person I'm trying to be in all situations. I must say, it's quite satisfying. I love coming back to my little home base of "honest and gracious" in all situations. It eliminates the drama of everyday life and allows space for so much more.

To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. ~e.e. cummings, 1955

Always be a first-rate version of yourself, instead of a second-rate version of somebody else. ~Judy Garland

Enjoyo your Happy Tuesday!

2011-06-23T21:21:00.000-07:00

Perseverance is a great element of success. If you only knock long enough and loud enough at the gate, you are sure to wake up somebody. -Henry Wadsworth Longfellow

Hudson and his first real meeting with Eddie the dog.He will have struggles to overcome, just as we all do, and I hope he continues to push throughout his life.

When the world says, "Give up",

Hope whispers, "Try it one more time". "

Consider the postage stamp: its usefulness consists in the ability to stick to one thing till it gets there. ~Josh Billings

Life is not about how fast you run or how high you climb but how well you bounce. ~Vivian Komori

2011-06-14T16:00:00.000-07:00

All the art of living lies in a fine mingling of letting go and holding on.” – Havelock Ellis

Recent walk through Central Park

As I was riding the subway today, I was struck with how irritated I had become. Typically, I don't have to take the train at all. I live so close to work that I walk every day. I walk everywhere I need to go. On the rare occasion that I take the train, it's not for long and I usually find something to occupy my time in some way.

Today as I spent an hour going from Manhattan to Brooklyn, I was struck with this concept of "letting go". I was so fiercely holding onto so many emotions--I didn't want to be late meeting my friend, I was annoyed at everyone on the train, the stopping and starting, the delays...as I went over the bridge, I had to remind myself about the letting go I've been trying to do lately. Letting go: of control, of my life, over other people's actions and thoughts.

When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be.” – Lao Tzu

This has never been an easy idea for me. It's something I struggle with always. However, by letting go of old habits, people, memories and ideas, I open myself up to an entire new realm of possibilities. My heart is open. My mind is slowly (slooooowly) letting go and just trying to be. What do you need to let go of today on this Happy Tuesday?

We must be willing to let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the life that is waiting for us.” – Joseph Campbell

The Tao Te Ching says, When I let go of what I am, I become what I might be. When I let go of what I have, I receive what I need. Have you ever struggled to find work or love, only to find them after you have given up? This is the paradox of letting go. Let go, in order to achieve. Letting go is God’s law.” – Mary Manin Morrissey

2011-06-09T11:05:00.000-07:00

I said to my soul be still, and wait without hope; for hope would be hope of the wrong thing; wait without love, for love would be love of the wrong thing; there is yet faith. But the faith, and the love and thehope are all in the waiting. Wait without thought, for you are not ready for thought: so the darkness shall be the light, and the stillness the dancing. -T.S. Eliot

This week, I went to a great exhibit at the Park Avenue Armory. It was a sound/visual installation by an artist named Rjoji Ikeda. It was a wonderful installation that I was mesmerized by for over an hour. I was struck by not only the chaos that was present, but my favorite moments were those of stillness. I've been struggling with my own stillness (or lack thereof).

The secret of the receptive

must be sought in stillness

within stillness there remains

the potential for action

-Zhou Xuanjing

In this bustling city filled with excess and people seeking more, it's difficult to find those moments of stillness and appreciate doing nothing. I'm working on finding more moments of just being. Find your own moments of stillness this week, to allow life to enter and flourish.

We can make our minds so like still water that beings gather about us, that they may see their own images and so live for a moment with a clearer, perhaps even with a fiercer life because of our quiet. -William Butler

To the mind that is still, the whole universe surrenders. -Lao Tzu

2011-05-17T16:20:00.000-07:00

"As you wish"...

flower wishes

This week is typically one of my favorite weeks of the year. My birthday is Friday and I get to celebrate with good friends. One of my favorite traditions is that I come prepared with an arsenal of mini cupcakes and instead of blowing out the candles myself, I give everyone their own cupcake and their own candle. I love the moment of silence when my nearest and dearest are sending out their deepest desires to be fulfilled. It's a really beautiful moment and it's always the highlight of the evening for me.

I've been thinking this week what I would wish for this year. Many wishes have not come true (phewww!) and most are my wishes for other people. This year, I want to pour out those desires of my own true heart in the hopes that the universe will shower them back to me.

Be as you wish to seem. -Socrates

I wish for relationships that are honest and caring. I wish for contentment in who I am. I wish to be able to try and be honest and gracious in all situations--no matter how much it hurts. I wish for people who enjoy spending time with me. I wish for acceptance and peace, knowing that everything always works out as it should. I wish to continue to be open hearted, even when it seems impossible. I wish for strength when people try to break me down. I wish for an intrinsic knowledge that I am deserving. Whoops. Am I supposed to keep them a secret? Now, do I have to choose just one? Does this mean they won't come true? I think not. I'm prepared for greatness.

What are the wishes of your heart? I'm bravely going to offer mine out to the world on Friday and see what beautiful shower of delights come back to me and what little sprays of wonderfulness I can send out as well. I hope you'll join me and offer your wishes too.

What makes the difference between wishing and realizing our wishes? Lots of things, and it may take months or years for a wish to come true, but it's far more likely to happen when you care so much about a wish that you'll do all you can to make it happen. - Mr. Rodgers

2011-05-10T09:59:00.000-07:00

Everyone is gifted, but some people never open their package

After a long talk with my wonderful mom on Sunday, my heart was lighter and my head much clearer. She said something to me that I'm really trying to keep hold of:

The care you have for people is your gift. Don't ever let someone change that in you. You just find someone who deserves it -Judy Shamblin

For me, I get myself in trouble caring too much and I've been told that I should be more withholding of my attention and affections. Talking to my mom reminded me that, no, I am who I am. It gets me hurt sometimes. Maybe sometimes people don't reciprocate. There has to be (and I know there are because some of these glorious folks are a part of my life) people who accept it, feel they deserve it, and welcome my love and care. I think that in my close personal relationships, that is my gift. I don't want to be afraid of sharing that gift. I don't want to keep it for myself. I want people in my life that I can pour on the sweet syrup of friendship and love into. That's what I love in my life. It's what makes me happy. It is a gift. I feel very lucky that even though my big heart sometimes gets crushed, sometimes it also swells with the generous offerings my loves share with me.

What is your gift? Share it willingly, unafraid, and fully committed.

You give but little when you give of your possessions. It is when you give of yourself that you truly give. -Kahlil Gibran

The greatest gift you can give another is the purity of your attention -Richard Moss

Time is your most precious gift because you only have a set amount of it. You can make more money, but you can't make more time. When you give someone your time, you are giving them a portion of your life that you'll never get back. Your time is your life. That is why the greatest gift you can give someone is your time. -Rick Warren

2011-05-03T09:17:00.000-07:00

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud

was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.-Anais Nin

The beautiful magnolia tree outside my window was in full bloom. The gorgeous blossoms made me smile every time I sat in my little 'corner cafe' and did my writing. They were only there for two short weeks. Barely enough time to get to know them. I miss them already.

Magnolias are said to signify splendid beauty, dignity, and perseverance. I am trying to live my life this way. Trying to find the beauty in every day, feel dignified with my behavior, and persevere when things get rough. All I can do is keep trying. Perhaps the magnolia blooms more than once a year? I can only hope.

The living self has one purpose only: to come into its own fullness of being, as a tree comes into full blossom, or a bird into spring beauty, or a tiger into luster. -D.H. Lawrence

I believe in the compelling power of love. I do not understand it. I believe it to be the most fragrant blossom of all this thorny existence. -Theodore Dreiser

2011-03-08T15:13:00.000-08:00

Superman

This past weekend, my amazing group of 5th grade boys lost one of their "teammates". Israel Joseph was only ten years old when he died of cardiac arrest on Saturday morning.

While we try to teach our children all about life,

Our children teach us what life is all about.

~Angela Schwindt

Israel was a joy to have in my class. He was a natural leader. He had such an excitement for movement and learning. His eagerness for dance spilled out onto the floor every day, in the form of his graceful movements. He was one of the kids in class who truly loved to dance. I could always count on Israel to answer any question I posed to the group. He was not only a great example to his peers, but brought so much joy to our class.

Children will not remember you for the material things you provided but for the feeling that you cherished them. -Richard L. Evans

When I spoke to the children about it on Monday, they requested that we do some of Israel's favorite moves as a way to celebrate him. He always loved jumping. We would often having jumping contests to see who was the highest jumper. Israel was always one of the highest jumpers in the class and almost every class would request that we do his favorite kind of jump, 'Supermans'.

It is so difficult to process it all right now. It is difficult since I worked so much with their bodies every day. This past Monday, I was constantly looking for him in his 'spot' in class. I kept seeing him in my mind and the part during class where I would always go over and fix his foot on the barre. He was a wonderful boy that will be greatly missed.

When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall

see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your

delight.

~Kahlil Gibran

2011-03-01T16:12:00.000-08:00

The windows of my soul

I throw wide open to the sun

-John Greenleaf Whittier

Each month I've been choosing a mantra, or idea, to embrace for one month. I've gathered quite a collection of gems (my favorite isn't really Internet appropriate). The idea for February was "Open Up". I tend to have these ideas of guarding my heart, my ideas, my self. I've really been working on creating space for people to enter the grounds of the property and enter into my life. To open up so that I can have deeper relationships with friends, family, and great people I have kept on the perimeter of the grounds for quite awhile.

If your everyday practice is open to all your emotions, to all the people you meet, to all the situations you encounter, without closing down, trusting that you can do that - then that will take you are far as you can go. And then you'll understand all the teachings that anyone has ever taught

-Pema Chodron

There have certainly been some potholes in my adventure. Sometimes, I'm the type of person who has very black and white views--there is no middle. So, when I decide to "open up", I throw away the doors and windows and scream, "COME ON IN!". Now, this is not the best approach with most people. Often, I need to just unlock the door and wait quietly inside. I'll keep working on it and see what it brings.

We need to give each other the space to grow, to be ourselves, to exercise our diversity. We need to give each other space so that we may both give and receive such beautiful things as ideas, openness, dignity, joy, healing, and inclusion.

-Max de Pree

2010-12-16T09:38:00.000-08:00

"I do it for the joy it brings, cause I'm a joyful girl. 'Cause the world owes us nothing, we owe each other the world". -Ani DiFranco

This week is one of my favorite weeks of the school year. It's open class week, where visitors can come in and watch the children in their dance classes. I had several wonderful friends (thank you!) join my boys class yesterday, and something I keep hearing around the office this morning is how joyful the boys are.

It is such a different experience teaching classes where the children are joyful about what they are doing. Often, the adult classes I teach are filled with such self judgement, criticism, frustration---I wish they would have one ounce of the joy for dancing ballet that my boys do. It makes me think how different my life would be if I just expressed more joy in the things I do, more joy to the people I spend time with, and more joy just being.

"Joy is increased by spreading it to others" -Robert Murray

Hope my buddy Chad puts a smile on your face and brings a little joy to your day. Go ahead. Smile. Permission to be joyful for the things/people/activities you love in your life.

"Joy is the feeling of grinning inside" -Melba Colgrove

2010-12-09T06:46:00.000-08:00

I'm a fighter, not a quitter. -Peter Mandelson

Today is the day of birth for my nephew. My brother and his wife have had quite the journey with the pregnancy, and today is the day that they find out which doctor is right.

www.shamblinfamily.com

I believe this baby is going to be a fighter. I am ready for his fierce entrance into the world and I can't wait to hold him in my arms.

Little Baby Shams, you're going to be amazing--these are the little bits that relate to you:

"Your birth on the 9th day of the month adds a tone of idealism and humanitarianism to your nature. You become one who can work easily with people because you are broadminded, tolerant and generous. You are ever sensitive to others' needs and feelings, and even if the other numbers in your core makeup don't show it, you are very sympathetic and compassionate. Your feeling run deep and you often find yourself in dramatically charged situations. This 9 energy always tends to give more that it get".

I hope this means you're gonna work with your Mama and the doctors this morning and be sensitive to them all. I know it will be a drama filled day, but be tolerant.

"6′s are idealistic and need to feel useful to be happy. A strong family connection is important to them. Their emotions influence their decisions. They have a strong urge to take care of others and to help. They are very loyal and make great teachers. They like art or music. They make loyal friends who take the friendship seriously. 6′s should learn to differentiate between what they can change and what they cannot".

You are being welcomed into the best family you could hope for. We are all awaiting your blissful arrival into our world. Your mama and papa are so loving, generous, and compassionate. They are going to be there for you every step of the way. Come on Baby Shams....you can do it!

2010-11-30T19:54:00.000-08:00

It is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is the most adaptable to change-Charles Darwin

This past weekend, I had several days off from work--and all to myself. It was a holiday weekend that I would have never thought I'd be spending on my own. If you would have asked me a year ago what I'd be doing, I would have known the exact answer. However, life likes to throw us curve balls and mixes things up every once in a while. Thus, my holiday weekend was not at all what I expected or planned. When people asked me what I did, I was hesitant to answer. It was kind of letdown. A disappointing weekend that I had taken off from work. Many friends had to re-arrange scheduled plans, and I found myself re-routing my agenda each day. Those of you who know me, know that I'm not very great at "change of plans". However, in the words of a great friend, I decided to "ease up and slow my roll". I took the weekend as it came. I treated myself nicely. I baked. Cleaned. Wrote. Read. Walked. Smiled at kids on the street. Took pictures. Had tea. Put up my own Christmas tree. Looked through old pictures. Took myself to movies, the Christmas market, the store. Laughed out loud. All in all, I just lived. I survived. I had wanted to just forget this past weekend and try to forget Thanksgiving 2010. But, I realized, I want to remember it. I want to remember that I'm alive. I'm surviving. Life isn't always ideal, but I want to remember how strong I am. How strong we all are. We continue to survive and make it through each day. Life keeps giving us exactly what we can handle and we get through it. I'd like to believe that next year I'll be in that place in my life that I want to be, but even stronger. The two pictures included are from the same street, one from last year, and one from this year that I took today. A year ago, I took a picture because it was my favorite block during the Winter. Interestingly enough, I live on that very block today....

2010-11-23T09:57:00.000-08:00

(My submission to Cupcake Wars BK)

Saw a wonderful quote this weekend that I really loved:

“You have four choices:

do it and enjoy doing it
do it and don't enjoy doing it
don't do it and enjoy not doing it
don't do it and don't enjoy not doing it....”

I really love the simplicity of this quote. Prompted by my good friend Deborah, I think it may be a good idea to take a sort of end of the year inventory of things that I spend my time doing, and going through each one asking if I enjoy doing them, if I enjoy not doing them, and so forth. When it comes down to it, our choices are really easily put into those categories. For my hamster wheel of a mind, it makes complicated choices and decisions so much easier. So, some food for thought as you go through your week and figure out what you want to be filling your life with.

Have a Happy Tuesday!

2010-11-03T05:43:00.000-07:00

The other day a man asked me what I thought was the best time of life. "Why," I answered without a thought, "now." ~David Grayson

There are daily reminders of how precious life is. Today I was reminded how fragile, beautiful, and strange life is. I, myself, get so wrapped up in working and making a living--sometimes I forget that I need to just live. Because not every person gets that amazing opportunity.

Not many words to share.

One of my favorite pictures: Me and my baby brother. When I found out it was a boy, I stood on my head and cried and cried. I didn't want my parents to bring him home. I didn't want a brother. Oh, how stupid I was. He is such a bright spot in my life and I don't know what I would do without him. I am blessed with his life.

Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as by the attitude you bring to life; not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens." -Kahlil Gibran

Do something today that you've always wanted to do, but you keep putting off. Call someone you love that you often think, 'eh, I'll call them tomorrow". Live each moment.

2010-10-24T09:18:00.000-07:00

To have that sense of one's intrinsic worth...is potential to have everything". -Joan Didion

Intrinsic
–adjective

1. Belonging naturally; essential.

2. (of a muscle) Contained wholly within the organ on which it acts.

As of late, I've been trying to develop an intrinsic motivation in my students. Ideally, I want them to look to themselves to see if they are proud of their work, rather than seeking my attention and approval. I think it's such a valuable tool, and ultimately (the hope) is that they will to do work that makes themselves feel good and proud.

"Poor is the man who does not know his own intrinsic worth and tends to measure everything by relative value. A man of financial wealth who values himself by his financial net worth is poorer than a poor man who values himself by his intrinsic self worth". -Sydney Madwed

This week, I'm going to try to go within and figure out what ticks for me intrinsically. What is within my heart that makes it happy--because lord only knows no one else is bringing it my way! This is always quite a conundrum to me--how can I completely develop and foster my own value without any input from outside sources? Is it possible? You tell me.

Enjoy your week and have a very Happy Tuesday

2009-02-22T19:18:00.000-08:00

2009-02-01T15:36:00.000-08:00

Surrender

"Surrender! You mean you wish to surrender to me? Very well, I accept"--The Princess Bride

sur·ren·der - 1 a : to yield to the power, control, or possession of another upon compulsion or demand b : to give up completely or agree to forgo especially in favor of another 2 a : to give (oneself) up into the power of another especially as a prisoner b : to give (oneself) over to something (as an influence) intransitive senses : to give oneself up into the power of another : YIELD synonym

I tend to have difficulty yielding control of situations and I always want to be in control of what's happening. I think sometimes it's important to just give into what is happening and let someone, or something, else take control.

"Change is the essence of life. Be willing to surrender what you are for what you could become"

I think this week I'm going to try to surrender to what is happening in life; to what is happening every day. Not try to change the situation or try to fix things, as I typically try to do.

“If you surrender completely to the moments as they pass, you live more richly those moments.” - Anne Morrow Lindbergh

“Give up all bad qualities in you, banish the ego and develop the spirit of surrender. You will then experience Bliss.” - Sri Sathya Sai Baba

2009-01-29T16:45:00.000-08:00

Peace

Being at peace is a daily (if not minute by minute) struggle for me. I'm what my friend Deb calls a "deflector". It's not that I need to distract myself with activities, but rather I like to deflect situations away from myself. I reallly struggle to just be at peace--not thinking, doing, dancing, baking, just being. I think being in the city really does not foster a sense of peace during the day. It is all about running around, and I've lately felt overwhelmed and like I'm going to fall apart.

Luckily, I've been in a little retreat mode the past few days, and have felt more at peace than I have in the past year.

"When you find peace within yourself, you become the kind of person who can live at peace with others"

"Peace is not something you wish for; it's something you make, something you do, something you are, and something you give away"

"Peace is a daily, a weekly, a monthly process. Gradually changing opinions, slowly eroding old barriers, quietly builing new structures"

Thankfully, here's my current view to find some peace...

2009-01-25T20:14:00.000-08:00

2008-12-09T09:02:00.000-08:00

Lately I've been feeling like I've hit rock bottom. I am just not at the place I wanted to be in my life at all. Is anyone at that point ever? Where they 'want' to be? I feel like I'm so far from the idea of where I wanted to be at this point in my life and I don't know how to resolve those feelings. Lately, I've just felt broken down.

When the Japanese mend broken objects, they aggrandize the damage by filling the cracks with gold. They believe that when something's suffered damage and has a history it becomes more beautiful. ~Barbara Bloom

I'm trying to believe that these things that have damaged me have, in fact, made me a stronger and more beautiful person. That because of my experience, I have gained insight. I'm trying to believe that everything happens for a reason and that there is a reason I am where I am in my life right now. There must surely be a reason that things didn't go the way I thought they were going to go in my life...right?

If one dream should fall and break into a thousand pieces, never be afraid to pick one of those pieces up and begin again. ~Flavia Weedn

So, i'm trying to pick up the pieces and instead of staying lying on the ground of this 'rock bottom' that I'm feeling I hit; I'm digging my way out.

2008-05-27T10:49:00.000-07:00

Indecision is like a stepchild: if he does not wash his hands, he is called dirty. If he does, he is wasting water --African Proverb

I think I am probably one of the most indecisive people that I know. It isn't because I don't like one option or another, it is just that usually I'm happy with either decision. What kind of food? Thai or sushi? Love 'em both. I think many times, I'm paralysed and unable to make a decision for fear that I will make the "wrong" choice. A wise woman often says to me, "there are regrets and happiness with every decision". Oh so true. No matter which option you choose as your final decision, there may be regrets that you didn't choose choice 'b'. You may also have immense happiness from choosing 'a'.

We are often presented with choices and sometimes don't know which will bring the most positive value to our lives. I think the important thing is that once you make a choice, you have to have the commitment to stand behind it and go for it!

If we are to learn to improve the quality of the decisions we make, we need to accept the mysterious nature of our snap judgements --Malcolm Gladwell

Every decision has a cost. Do I have to make this decision at all, or can I move onto the next thing? What we decided to leave out is almost as important as what we put in. --Joshua Schachter

When you determined what you want, you have made the most important decision of your life. You have to know what you want in order to attain it. --Douglas Lurtan

2008-05-20T09:00:00.000-07:00

"Inspiring others to happiness brings you happiness" -My yogi tea bag

It's a totally happy Tuesday here in NYC. Despite the overcast weather and sprinkles, it's a great day out here. Best birthday How I Met Your Mother Style.

I saw the quote above this morning on my yogi tea bag and was thinking just how true it is. That is what really does make me happy. Seeing other people happy, encouraging their own happiness, sharing in their happiness--that's what I love. That is what brings me the most happiness in my own life. People always think I'm a little silly on my birthday when I make everyone wish with me...but that's how I roll. My wish is that you each make your own happiness.

"So much sadness exists in the world that we are all under obligation to contribute as much joy as lies within our powers." ~ John Sutherland Bonnell

"Happiness is an attitude. We either make ourselves miserable, or happy and strong. The amount of work is the same." ~ Francesca Reigler, artist

"Joy has nothing to do with material things, or with man's outward circumstance...A man living in the lap of luxury can be wretched, and a man in the depths of poverty can overflow with joy." ~ William Barclay

2008-05-06T13:01:00.001-07:00

"When the going gets rough, that's not a sign that you must lower your expectations. It is precisely during such times that your best strategy is to raise those expectations".

I think it is so easy to just try to "get by" in life. It is so easy to just try to break even and try to survive. It is difficult when you have nothing to work towards--when you don't have something to motivate and inspire you.

"If you paint in your mind a picture of bright and happy expectations, you put yourself into a condition conducive to your goal" -Norman Vincent Peale

It is so important to not only live each day fully, but recognize how much more life has to offer and bring to you. So, set your expectations higher and get ready for greatness!

"Achievement is largely the product of steadily raising one's levels of aspiration and expectation" -Jack Nicklaus

2008-04-29T10:05:00.000-07:00

Don't settle for something you can live with,
find something you can't live without

Are you just 'living' with your current job? I often think how lucky I am that my job is doing something that I love, and how unusual that is. I really don't know that I could live without it. It brings me so much joy and happiness doing what I do. Wouldn't it be amazing if everyone could find a job that they couldn't live without? Even if it isn't a job--maybe a hobby, a friend, a dog (that's for you Matt).

Creativity is a drug I cannot live without -Cecil B Demille

So, today, think of something that you are just 'living' with and find the things, people, places that you know you can't live without.

I can live without money, but I cannot live without love -Judy Garland

Man cannot live without joy - St Thomas Aquinas

2008-04-15T10:04:00.000-07:00

Happy Tuesday! The words below are not mine, but from something I read a while back. Hope you have a great Tuesday!

Every choice has certain benefits. And every choice has its costs.

If you are willing to bear the costs of a particular choice in order to enjoy the benefits, then go ahead with it. If the costs are too high for you when compared to the benefits, then move on and find another, more appropriate choice.

When you adopt an attitude that life, or the world, or your community owes you something, you set yourself up for extreme disappointment. Realize instead that you are already living in a universe filled with abundance, and that creating meaningful value out of that abundance is up to you.

No matter who you are, where you are from, or what you have, a life of fulfillment requires personal effort, commitment and integrity from you. It is through making continued positive choices that you line up life's abundance in ways that uniquely express your visions and values.

Every moment is a choice, and every choice is an opportunity to build real and meaningful value in your life. Your choices enable you to direct efforts so that those efforts add up to something great and desirable.

Through the choices you make, you have the power to access the very best of life. Choose often, choose wisely, choose with the highest intentions, and your choices will take you precisely where you wish to go.

-- Ralph Marston

2008-04-01T09:41:00.000-07:00

Okay folks, today we have a guest blogger for Happy Tuesdays!!!!! ENJOY! :)

Hey, I'm Matt, Tammi's office mate. Basically Tammi is too lazy and uninspired to blog on this Mediocre Tuesday, so she basically forced me to write something or quote someone. It wasn't her asking me if I'd like to write something, it was her telling me to move, so she can log me into to her account and telling me I HAD TO WRITE something. As if I don't have enough work today. Thanks Tammi.
I don't know how many of you have ever worked with Tammi, but boy is she bossy? huh? Always coming in late, stealing my lunch and M&M's, making me do all her work and now making me do her blog. So, I've decided that while I'm logged in as her, I can check her email, reply to everyone as if I'm her and be all crude and mean, then go to a bunch of porn sites and sign her up for awesome junk mail. That's what you get Tammi, a fist full of porn!
But since, I'm here "blogging" I should say, I've never blogged before, so I'm going to try and use Tammi's style. Here I go:

I've been doing a lot of thinking recently about the steps that I've taken in my life to get where I am today. Not job wise where I am today, but more importantly, relationship wise. With friends and my fiance. The best years in my life were in college. Thats where I feel like the best steps were taken in these relationships. Every night I would party or even just hang with the best group of friends you could imagine. We were like Made Men, the cool kids. We were like the crew from Saved By the Bell (before the new class or the college years and without Screech). Everyone wanted to hang with us. Upon graduation, most of us moved to this wonderful island of a city. But there is something in the real world, that I think actually makes you take steps back or maybe it is taking leaps forward. Whether it be responsibilities, or real jobs, or what? Currently, I live maybe a 2 mile walk to most of my college friends, but on most nights, that is too far, to just hang. Or maybe it is too late, or for whatever reason, we just stop calling, stop talking, and now stop seeing each other. In fact, these friends, that I used to call my brothers and sisters, are now strangers.
Why is the real world so alienating? I might pass them on the street and no one would even notice. Just walk right by someone that I spent almost everyday of four years with. But my big question is, are they feeling the alienation too? Or is it just me? Am I the only one who has lost touch and grew up too fast? In high school, I told my best friend that if he ever needed my kidney, he can have it. Now, if he called me, I probably wouldn't pick up, because I don't even have his number in my phone anymore. We told each other that we would be each others best men at our weddings. Now, he wont even be invited.
What felt so important and infinite then, now just seems like a numb dusty photograph hidden away in an album.
Wow, these blogs are depressing. Let's all call our high school sweet heart up, or our high school or college wingman. Let's see if we aren't as alienated as we thought.
Usually Tammi throws a quote in here...hmm. Well let's try this one.

"Peter Pan always said that dieing would be his greatest adventure, but thats coming from a boy who never grew up. I think reconnecting with the lost boys, will be just as great of an adventure." -- Mark Twain

April fool's that wasn't Mark Twain's quote, i just made it up. he he he. Hope your Tuesday is happier than our mediocre one, and I'm sorry if I depressed you. I feel like that girl from Sex and The City or like I am writing a monologue from The Wonder Years.
So how did I do?
Matt

2008-03-25T20:02:00.000-07:00

It is better to live your own destiny imperfectly than to live an imitation of someone else's life with perfection"-The Bhadavad Gita (ancient Indian yogic text)

My lovely friend Nicole (thanks dear!) emailed me the above quote (see, we are all just inspirations to one another) and it got me thinking.

Make of the quote what you will, but here's what I take from it on this Happy Tuesday. I think it is so easy to get caught up in what someone else thinks is the "perfect life". Yesterday I was watching an episode of How I Met Your Mother that my wonderful office mate, Matt, has me hooked on. In one particular episode, two of the main characters, a couple, decide that they are going to try to change the way they are living their life. They want to fit in with their other married friends, so they start having wine tastings, scrabble night, whatever they think that the other people might like and what might be a part of those other people's lives. They soon realize that they have to live the life that they enjoy (for them it is a different life than that of their friends) and that the life they enjoy is just fine for them. They don't have to live what someone else thinks is a good, fun, or enjoyable life. They get to decide what that life is.

The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You don't blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the President. You realize that you control your own destiny--Albert Ellis

I think we are often sold what it is we should be wanting in life. What kind of car we should be wanting to drive, what neighborhood is the best place for us to live in, what clothes we should be wearing, what professions are valuable...I think that it takes a really strong person to stand up and decide for themselves what their best life is. To not let society, our peers, or our own insecurities dictate the life we lead is a difficult thing to do. I think it is easy to live the life that is easily outlined for us--dictating for us who to be and what to do. But is that the life you want?

Men heap together the mistakes of their lives and create a monster they call destiny--John Liver Hobbes

I say go out today and make your own mistakes. Thereby making your own destiny and your own unique, beautiful, inspiring, and imperfect life. It's all yours! Enjoy it!

It's choice - not chance - that determines your destiny.--Jean Nidetch

2008-03-18T08:49:00.000-07:00

Think of the best possible thing that you could accomplish today, and then ask yourself this. What would be even better?

I often think that it is so easy to get caught up in the hum drum of life and just be satisfied with our current state. Unfortunately, that current state is not always the best life that is possible for each of us. I feel sometimes like I get complacent and stop really trying to make life better. The danger in that is that I often start to feel like there is nothing more--that this is the best, right now, when there is really so much more.

Never again clutter your days or nights with so many menial and unimportant things that you have no time to accept a real challenge when it comes along . This applies to play as well as work. A day merely survived is no cause for celebration . You are not here to fritter away your precious hours when you have the ability to accomplish so much by making a slight change in your routine. No more busy work. No more hiding from success. Leave time, leave space, to grow. Now. Now! Not tomorrow! -Og Mandino

I think this quote combines my feelings last week of living in the moment, with the thought of striving to make each of our lives better. Maybe instead of lowering your expectations to be more in line with reality, raise those expectations and then improve your reality so it matches them. I think the quality of your life right now depends on how you live it right now. It isn't what it could be tomorrow (although it is nice to plan ahead, no?).

Today can be the moment when you can mold life into whatever you would like it to be. Take a deep breath, stand up, walk forward and truly live all the wonder that is waiting for you to grab a hold of it.

I hope that I may always desire more than I can accomplish. -Michelangelo

You are not here merely to make a living. You are here to enable the world to live more amply, with greater vision, and with a finer spirit of hope and achievement. You are here to enrich the world. You impoverish yourself if you forget this errand. -Woodrow Wilson

2008-03-04T10:04:00.000-08:00

Let the credit card companies market as they will, the only thing that's priceless is Now. ~Caleb Baylor Hive, 2005

Lately I've been having a difficult time living in the "now". I have a tendency to either think too much about the past, or worry too much about the future. When you are thinking about the past, when are you thinking about it? When you are worrying about the future, when are you worrying about it? I think this is so important to realize that everything happens NOW.

We seem to be going through a period of nostalgia, and everyone seems to think yesterday was better than today. I don't think it was, and I would advise you not to wait ten years before admitting today was great. If you're hung up on nostalgia, pretend today is yesterday and just go out and have one hell of a time. ~Art Buchwald

Not much else to say, but enjoy the moments of your existence today and the now you have.

Having spent the better part of my life trying either to relive the past or experience the future before it arrives, I have come to believe that in between these two extremes is peace. ~Author Unknown

It is only possible to live happily-ever-after on a day-to-day basis. ~Margaret Bonnano

2008-02-25T18:42:00.000-08:00

Hope, at the end of the day, connects us all no
matter how different we are --Marketa Irglova

This past Sunday, during the Oscars, I heard this great quote. To me, it seems to be something that can resonate with everyone. I think hope is the one thing that gets each of us through the days--sometimes it is the only thing that keeps one going forward. The woman who said this quote is an indie musician who had a dream and made it happen. She and the co-writer made a simple film called Once with very little money and took home the Oscar for best Original Song. Not only did I enjoy this un-Hollywood movie when it came out, but I always love hearing stories like this. People reaching an unimaginable dream--it inspires me, motivates me, and most of all: gives me a sense of hope that the dreams I have are achievable.

Every person has an ideal, a hope, a dream which represents the soul. We must give to it the warmth of love, the light of understanding, and the essence of encouragement.
--Colby Dorr Dam

Maybe there is a goal that has seemed unattainable, a job that is unbearable, an action unforgivable. Keep hope that things are going to be just fine. There is always hope that situations will improve, and let that hope propel you into the positive situation that is waiting there quietly in the corner, ready to be discovered.

I've saved my favorite quote for last, mainly because I hope that today I'm leaving the world a bit better myself.

When I was young, my ambition was to be one of the people who made a difference in this world. My hope still is to leave the world a little bit better for my having been here. It's a wonderful life and I love it
--Jim Henson

2008-02-19T11:58:00.000-08:00

Welcome back!

Well, yes, I know it's been quite some time since you have received your Happy Tuesday. I have no good excuse for not writing. Sheer laziness I think. I got some major motivation this weekend, and after hearing from several old friends telling me that they missed happy Tuesdays (I think maybe they just miss the baked goodies!), I decided to get off my rear and get back into action.

"I get up every morning determined to both change the world and have one hell of a good time. Sometimes this makes planning my day difficult" --E.B. White

I found this quote today and it made me remember just how much I used to love doing Happy Tuesdays--the smiles on my friends faces, the shock of strangers eyes, the office detectives who would try to figure out who was doing all this kooky stuff. I realized that it isn't necessarily putting the "cupcake song" on and rocking out in my kitchen that I enjoy, but rather the smile that I get in my heart when someone else is happy. So, today, I put on my song, baked me some cupcakes...now I've got to go find some strangers who are agreeable to unknown cupcakes!
So, my goal this week, starting now is to make a positive change in my life, with the hopes that it will influence the life of someone else.

"Change is the constant, the signal for rebirth, the egg of the phoenix" -Christina Baldwin

I think the only way that we can continue to lead positive, healthy, enjoyable lives is to continue to change. So go out today and make one change you've been needing, wanting, afraid to take. See how it effects your life and those around you.

"Human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives" -William James

Be the fiery phoenix that ignites a happy flame where ever you go. Be well. Be happy.
Love,
Tammi

2006-07-05T14:46:00.001-07:00

What are you scared of??

A few weeks ago, I went to see Cat Power at Town Hall....Chan was beautiful and put on nearly a two hour show. The amazing thing is, the girl has terrible stage fright. She is notorious for leaving stage in the middle of a concert. She kinda freaks out and then just up and leaves... After leaving the show, I was thinking how amazing it was that she faced her biggest fear and obviously overcame it.

I started to think that it truly was quite special because, quite frankly, how many people face their fears every day? I know that I don't. I love to stay in my comfort zone and live my life doing things that I know. Fortunately, New York forces me out of this mode a lot of times. I really don't think that I would have grown as much as a person had I not moved here. I don't know what my biggest fear is anymore...I'll have to give it some thought...

“Too often we are scared, scared of what we might not be able to do, scared of what people might think if we tried, we let our fears stand in the way of our hopes. Why? There's really no time to be afraid. You have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Everything!”

2006-07-05T14:44:00.000-07:00

Seeing this made my Tuesday VERY happy...

2006-05-24T16:04:00.000-07:00

At last! I know you were all counting the days until the return of Happy Tuesdays. Okay, maybe not, but one is coming your way anyhow!

This past week has led me down nostalgia lane, as my birthday always does. This year was (I must confess) an amazing birthday. Dare I say the best one yet! Not only did the Chow Family visit, but we had an amazing party here at Casa Scher-Shamblin that was not to be missed! We had Tammi-tinis and the chocolate fountain was flowing :) It was so nice to have people come and celebrate my special day and be their wonderful giving and generous selves. The Chow's joined us in Brooklyn for a day of outer-borough fun and then we had a great opportunity to see ABT's Gala Performance! Oh la la! Amazing.

My birthday always makes me think of where I have been and what was happening last year at this time, and past years. I have this terrible habit of looking back at certain choices that I made and beating myself up about having made the "wrong" decision. As of late though, I've come to the realization that it is so important to love all those things that have happened in the past. It is a complete waste of time to just dwell on the people that I spent time with that turned out to be goobers, a place I lived that I hated, or a job that was terrible. I really feel that each of those choices has brought me to where I am now. The person that I have become and each one of those "regrets" is actually a wonderful piece of my puzzle of a life. I go back and forth with this battle of regrets and I battle the feeling that I may have wasted time in my life. I guess the only current waste of time is still thinking about those things, rather than just accepting them and loving each regret. I think that it really allows me to no longer think of those choices as regrets, but simply a different choice.

I guess all I'm saying is that it is no use to take up the precious moments of the current days worrying about the days that have past. So, go ahead, love those regrets, and in time--regret nothing.

Make the most of your regrets. . . . To regret deeply is to live afresh-Thoreau

2005-10-25T14:50:00.000-07:00

(Breathe Deep)

Well, we've had a big Nor'Easter, as they call 'em out here. The storm has made for not-so-pleasant weather and yucky weather makes me feel like getting cozy in bed with a good book and a great cup of cocoa. There is seemingly no time for that though. I've been feeling a little (dare I say) stressed lately. I had a major "missing CA lifestyle" sort of weekend. That laid back, no one honks unless there is a sign of danger, people smile at you in the store, etc. As I came home today on the train I wondered if this particular night-maybe, just maybe-there won't be someone arguing on their way home or people fighting over an empty seat, then it is onto the gym, then come home and make dinner, pick up the junk that I threw on the floor as I came home, do the dishes, get ready for work tomorrow, and blah blah blah. So, I've decided that a little time for relaxation is needed. I think it is something we take for granted, but the studies about relaxation are amazing--the fact that more creativity and productivity comes out of five simple minutes of relaxation.

The time to relax is when you don't have time for it ~Sidney J. Harris

I know that, for me, HT is a method of relaxation. But, for some reason I don't find the thirty minutes every week for it....I always seem to think there are other things I should be doing with my time.

Don't underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can't hear, and not bothering. ~Pooh's Little Instruction Book, inspired by A.A. Milne

Now I've had my glimpse of relaxation, it is your turn! So, I give you full permission to RELAX! Go and sit on your butt and do NOTHING! Don't even think about rushing around today...you've got a full five minutes of YOU time. May this day be filled with relaxation in a multitude of ways :)

Tension is who you think you should be. Relaxation is who you are ~Chinese Proverb

If a man insisted always on being serious, and never allowed himself a bit of fun and relaxation, he would go mad or become unstable without knowing it
~Herodotus(484 BC - 430 B

2005-10-04T06:46:00.000-07:00

No, I am not brain damaged....

Today I'm counting my lucky stars and wondering what exactly in life has happened that gives me any right to be grumpy? Nothing really! Yesterday I got a slight concusion after falling down half a flight of stairs (yes, they call me grace) and seemed to have gotten a slight concussion. I spent the majority of the day in the ER while they checked me out. Apparently, when I first came in to the ER, they thought I was brain damaged because I was holding my feet in a sous-sous and pointing my toes, which happens to brain damage victims I guess.

So, I decided a few weeks ago to start a Happy Tuesday blog so that those who don't want to read my rambles can not click on the link and those who do....well, can!
This week I thought HT should be about being grateful. I know it is a little ahead of Thanksgiving, but I figure that we can be thankful for things every day, not just a silly holiday.

Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn't learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn't learn a little, at least we didn't get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn't die; so, let us all be thankful.--Buddha

I think that being scaredwas the worst part about the whole afternoon (okay, maybe them cutting my clothes--my favourite shirt--to shreds was pretty bad at the end of the day)...there were all these doctors around in the trauma room and no one was telling me what was going on, so I started to get a little scared--maybe something was wrong.

Gratitude is the best attitude. ~Author Unknown

Gratitude is looking on the brighter side of the life, even if it means hurting your eyes. ~ Ellen DeGeneres

Yes, indeed, my eyes do hurt today (and my sore butt and head) but I'm just going to go out there and have a good day. At least I have a good day to go out to! The sun is shining, I have the day off of work, I have wonderful people that I love to spend my time with, and heck--I'm alive!
I challenge anybody in their darkest moment to write what they're grateful for, even stupid little things like green grass or a friendly conversation with somebody on the elevator. You start to realize how rich you are. ~ Jim Carrey

So your challenge of today is to just write a small list of the things you are grateful for today. Then later on, if you need a little pick me up, just look at your list. I'm serious people, at least TRY it!

Be well. Be grateful. Be HAPPY!

xoxo
t